Easter Bloc Sound

Or, Fuck Yeah, Screentones

I spent two days in Budapest last week and it sounded like this:
(ahem. my sketchbook)

The Weeknd – The Zone

The Weeknd – High for This

I drew these pictures on the train (don’t even ask about how much herpderp I had with the Hungarian train) and then added the screen tones once I got home….

Screentones
Screen-tones are the sheets of patterns (generally small dots) that they used in days of yore to give depth and backgrounds to comic-book pictures. When I was a kid, I was OBSESSED with screen-tones, alas, they don’t  use/sell them in the US anymore. Those dots and backgrounds are all added digitally and though its easy to find screen tone downloads for free even online, I could never find a place that sold physical Tone. It’s always been kinda my dream to make a picture and screentone it with not the digital shit.

They DO still use traditional screen-tone sheets to hand-screen manga in Japan. So last year on our Japan trip, a few sheets of tone was one of my treasure purchases. I looked up how to apply it on the internet, and though the instructions were pretty friggin’ clear… I think I pretty much managed to screw up EVERY SINGLE rule for applying the tone. ::dances::

1. Draw on a harder paper/board, so you can easily cut the tone away from the paper. (Nope, paper I used was cheap thin almost transparent sketchbook shizzle….)

2. The tone is on transparent sheets so be careful when removing it from the backing, to not add finger prints to it. (Yah, I added finger prints, in fact, I think an errant Dorito got trapped under the tone on the ‘Creation’ picture… and I was too lazy to get it out.

3. Use a massively sharp exacto knife to delicately cut the tone away from the paper, once you determine the areas you want to keep toned.
Nope. I used a dull chicken nugget to cut away the tone with the delicacy of a hungry mongoose–ah well. It was fun. Hungary was fun. Screen tones were fun.

GO LISTEN TO THE WEEKND <3
-I love you.
-I love You Tube: The Zone.

To All the Lovely People–

Looking at me with this defiant glint in their beady eyes as they stand on the two-way escalator, STAND, don’t walk, knowing I am completely reliant on this escalator to get out of the moist, warm bowels of the earth and that as soon as someone will get on the escalator at the top it will continue to move downwards, not upwards, and I will continue to not be able to move upwards, and yet you will not walk, oh no, not because you are tired or handicapped or your feet hurt or you are weighed down by packages or you are old, no, you don’t walk because by GOD, you’re looking at the idiot who didn’t know how to use a condom, so if I am saddled with a baby-carriage and have to wait eternities to get up the escalator while you, an able-bodied person, stands and does not walk down to make my life even incrementally easier, well, your eyes say, DARING me to call you a lazy cow who won’t move, well, you made your own bed, you had unprotected sex bwuhahahahaha so why don’t ya lie in it??

To this person, and all the people who look so goddamn miserable slash uppish because my kid is screaming in the public place (though the screaming will pass out of your life in a few minutes and it will stay in mine for at least a few more years) to y’all I’d like to say:

So YOU know how to use a rubber. ::ferrets around and procures a medal for you::

I wish your PARENTS had known how to use one, by god, then your beady little eyes wouldn’t even exist to have you squinch at me with.

Love,

-a crabby breeder sick of bitchy people on public transport.

[Yes, there have been many people recently, which is really funny, because during the pregnancy when the tentacle monster was contained in a straightjacket of stomach meat everyone moved mountains to make sure you're comfortable, can get past etc, and now that the little Satan-baby is actually able to run around and physically autonomous and I need about five arms to contain him and the pram and all the accoutrement, people are soooo frggin' rude, like these two Slavic bizatches giving me the evil eye coming down on the escalator the other day, burn my body if they weren't both healthy fully functioning feline fantastic females (more f's? feminine forensic fatalistic fuckers) perfectly capable of walking down, oh no, oh no, so finally we had to have a verbal altercation....

The epithet 'cow' may have been evoked.... >___<]

Guro Lite

Guro for the Masses – loose portrait of me and Takato Yamamoto right before he stabs me in the eyeball (note: VERY loose portrait >___>)

I’m the poor man’s guro drawer–erotic grotesque nonsense– ero guro (sometimes called just guro) is a genre those who know generally associate with dismembered anime girls and gore, but Wikipedia calls it a “prewar, bourgeois cultural phenomenon that devoted itself to explorations of the deviant, the bizarre, and the ridiculous,” manifested in the popular culture of Taishō Tokyo during the 1920s.” Sexual deviance? Culinary decadence??  I’m down with that, even if it’s got nothing to do with culinary decadence whatsoever.

I draw the gentler, lighter guro, that you could take home to meet your parents. More soft colors and bloody tears and less needles getting stabbed into eyeballs…

First Day of School – (Man it’s been a long time since I had to go to school, but I remember it feeling like this… no on no, no no no no no God, no no no no no, bloody tears.)

In my humble opinion, Takato Yamamoto is THE guro master. I would let him stab me in the eyeball so he could then draw a picture of it, Mr. Yamamoto, yes. A volunteer right here to get  blind for you. Not sure how that would help either of us, but I offer it to show you my extreme respect and good-will. Here is a link to him, you can take a little time to look at his art and we can cry together about how we can never be that good. Unless you are that good and then yah we can’t be friends anymore.

Happy April y’all. ~___~

If You Draw It…

…it will come.

Random sketches!

Haru – Spring 1.

Haru – Spring 2.

Dear Spring,

Where the aasdkfjsldkfjdf are you?

Love,

Moof.

PS: Happy belated first spring day, everybody ^^

NSFW – The Transfer

[A few days ago I made a post on WP when I was redirected to a page that told me my blog had been suspended for Terms of Service breach. I could contest this, but if I lost, I would lose all content on my blog. I thought damn, that's two years of posts! Turns out it was just a glitch, but yes, reviewing the terms, 'pornography' is one of the things you are not allowed to post on WP. Hmmm. Made me think a little about posting this picture, but it's so pretty that I had too...!! ;__; Please WP people, it's not pornography--it's ART!! Nobody get merg for me posting, k?].

‘Come touch me like I’m an ordinary man, see the look in my eyes. Underneath my skin is a violence, it’s got a gun in its hands. Ready to make sense of anyone or anything or anyone or anything or anyone or anything….’ The Transfer – censored

A very wise person (who I think is one of my friends, but I can’t remember now) said once, be careful what you draw, because that will become ‘your thing’. You know? Like Thomas Kincade’s thing is the glittery cottages and Degas’ thing is the ballerinas. Be careful what you draw, because people will start associating you with that and maybe you don’t want to be known as the person drawing orgies cottages…

My mom: So basically, somebody contacted you to draw them an orgy.
Me: Not an ‘orgy’. Some bodies, in commune with each other.
My mom: Well, I’m sure you’ll do a wonderful job! And if someone sees this orgy picture in this woman’s house, they will want their own!

No one can say my mom is not supportive of my efforts…

Remember when like one year back, I was lamenting that nobody wanted to pay me a million dollars to draw hentai on the beach?? Well, someone contacted me, a lovely and generous person, and asked me to make her two pictures. O_O. Because she had seen some other stuff I had online and she liked ‘my thing.’ She wrote she was sure I was really busy, but she would be willing to give me a pretty generous compensation….

I’ll say here,  the challenge intrigued me, but was also scary. There is nothing worse than being OCD and now having to worry about not just your own fucked up expectations, but someone else’s, someone shelling out and thus legitimately feeling like they have a large say in what direction the project goes in…

However, this person  is someone I’ve become friends with online over the last year, and she was very sweet and totally flexible. <3 The first picture, for the bedroom, was asked to be erotic, featuring several bodies–the final picture is actually enormous (think the size of a door), hence the horrible photo, but I don’t know. I’m very happy with how it turned out, and that is a rare and nice feeling. ^^

Me: So what do you think, mom?
Mom: It’s nice I guess, if that’s the type of thing you want to stare at all day….

I think I’m finding my thing….. ~_____~

 

Rapists’ Tears

This is a follow-up post regarding a previous post I made about the Steubenville rape case.

Ladies–(and gentlemen. Because gentlemen get raped too.) By the way, I will be talking about rape. …

A message from me to you, ladies (and gentlemen).

Cover yourselves up. Don’t smile so much.
Don’t wear your pants so tight.
And no underage drinking.

I mean, where we live today, rape is wrong, but underage drinking is wronger.
Rape is wrong, but wearing animal print pants out of control is wronger.

It’s called ‘co-responsibility’ and it works like this: People in society should not be raping you (because it is a crime), but you are also responsible to never place yourself in a situation of rape-ability.

You don’t want to ruin a bright young man’s bright future, right? With nasty accusations and criminal records. That shit is forever! So are your memories, but… he was going to play college ball!! Don’t you get it??

I know what you’re going to argue. But… but…..some women (and men) get raped in their bedrooms! Old women get raped, and women wearing sweatpants get raped, and lemme be blunt, totally ugly/unsexy people get raped, and people who have never had a drop of alcohol to drink in their lives get raped, so how do we separate what some really intelligent conservative called ‘legitimate rape’ from ‘hot little drunk bitch really wanted it’?

Should we make some kind of algorithm, where we can plug in the victim’s possible inebriation ‘y’ with the victim’s clothing/inherent sexiness ‘x’, which may be rather subjective, but oh well whatever, and then the amount of light on the street they happened to be walking home on ‘z’ (except maybe they were not walking on a street, but were at a party and then we’d have to jump to a different algorithm all together and that’s all really confusing so could we just say)

RAPE IS ALWAYS WRONG NO MATTER WHAT??

Shouldn’t it just always be wrong?

Well, but what you don’t seem to be understanding my naive little friend is  drunk girls and boobs! You know? The boobs?? And if these kids get caught for what they did–well, fuck! If you press charges, you’re going to ruin their lives!! You want a young person’s life to get ruined because drunk girls and boobs? I mean, I’m sure a boy who rapes an unconscious girl and takes pictures of it and posts it online and brags about it is a really sweet human being who has soooo much to offer society and I don’t think you should be stripping him of his chance to open his petals and fully blossom….!

Excuse me while I quietly retreat into the corner and puke myself stupid.

I hope Stephen Colbert tears CNN a new asshole. Because basically, all they had to say about the conviction of the two Steubenville rapists was (paraphrase) how heartbreaking it was to see two promising young men have their lives ruined by this conviction. Because two big bad football playing bravs broke down and cried when they heard they’d be going to Juvie until 21 and be registered sex offenders for the rest of their lives.

Yep. Rape conviction. It’s a fucking bitch. Give me a second while I break out some vanilla ice-cream with extra black dots to enjoy with this side of fresh squeezed warm rapists’ tears.

‘This is what happens when underage girls drink,’ some people said.
‘Girls need to control themselves and not put themselves and these boys in that position.’
‘Where were her parents? What kind of morals did they teach her?’
‘That is fucked up, that this young black man has to live with this rape conviction hanging over his head for the rest of his life.”

This is a paraphrase of some of the most disgusting tweets collected on the tumblr Public Shaming (started to capture embarrassing tweets that posters attempt to then delete.)

Now don’t get me wrong. I am all against under-age drinking. I am against not supervising your kids. But you know what I am MORE against?

If you said ‘rape’, you got it.

You know what’s funny though, when someone gets murdered, nobody talks about ‘co-responsibility’. Nobody says, ‘well sure, this guy gut KILLED, but…. what did he do to deserve it? I mean, he must’ve done SOMETHING REALLY SHITTY. Let’s find out what he did to get murdered and harp on that…” The idea being, that you do not deserve to get murdered, no matter what you were doing.

You do not deserve to get sexually assaulted/raped, no matter what you were doing. You are not PERMITTED to sexually assault/rape someone no matter what they are doing and THAT is what fucking CNN and these disgusting tweeters should be focusing on.

Rant through.

>___<

God Enters Through the Wound

Now don’t get mad at me for making god into this little wibbly thing, I mean you ever seen God? No I didn’t think so, so for all we know, he/she/it could look just like that. ^^

Ugh. This picture looks a thousand times better in real life and it’s a full spread and there is this fuckyeah Jugendstile explosion on the omitted right panel–but. As usual. Cannot take a decent pic/scan of it. So here’s the castrated version. ><

This post will be a little all over, sorry moofs.

I actually wanted to post it yesterday, March 1st, Self-Harm Awareness Day. If you’re not aware of self-harm, it’s what they used to call self-mutilation, the practice of repeated and compulsive (usually) cutting of the wrists, arms, legs or other parts of the body. Generally associated with teenagers and a practice that makes me very very sad.

There are many reasons for self-harm; abuse, neglect, lack of positive attention (yes, I believe as human beings we crave positive attention and we suffer severely when we are denied it…).

General insecurity. Poor body image. Bullying.

Not everyone’s got a sad story though, in my case, there was no reason for self-harm, I just looked at the world sometimes and it was so fucking heavy and vast, not always even in a bad way, that I had to make a hole on myself to let it all in (to let it all out?)

Nietzsche said that ‘God enters through the wound,’ and I think Nietzsche was a self-important misogynistic dickhead, but he had a few good one liners. I haven’t self-harmed in… what? Three years now? (Never a cutter, eeeg, too messy, I was a burner), but now I’m all grown up  and adults don’t do that shit anymore, right? We still think about it though, we think about it, and to those kids out there who are doing it and fighting the urge to do it again, I wish there was something ragingly positive I could say to you. :<

I want to talk about unicorn farts and pots of gold, but it would sound fake, so I’m just going to say, hang in there.

::Big hug::

And I hope all of you find the activity or the person or the place that makes that evil little voice inside curl up and die.

I want to dedicate this post to someone ^^. You know, on WP it will say if someone came to my blog from another website (or another blog) and about a week ago, a blog popped up who’s URL I didn’t recognize. I went and checked it out. At that point, there were only two entries, freshly created baby blog, so I read them both. First entry was pretty sad :<  Definitely someone who I could emotionally relate to. The next (so chronologically first) entry described sort of the aim and objective of the blog… and at the end of it, this anonymous person thanked me. I blinked. Yeah, me! She said (and I checked on the profile, she’s a girl) she said that I have saved her life and that I was her hero. O_O Can you fucking believe that?? I was like horrrri sheeet!? I know I couldn’t believe it, and I just sat there like an idiot and stared at the paragraph for a good few minutes and I felt this overwhelming feeling spread through to the tips of my fingers and toes, like wow.

Something I wrote or something I drew helped somebody.

And it felt incredibly warm, and humbling, and good.

So to that person, I would like to say thank you for writing such a thing, I know I feel like I don’t deserve it, but thanks just the same.You made me feel (no, I still feel!) ten meters tall. <3 <3

I wish you all the luck and write me if you ever want, okay? moof06@gmail.com

<3